My Hero's Journey

I am the hero in my journey. That’s what I’ve been learning for the past 5 months. I took a leap in June and joined an online coaching group. The group is for women and is led by a wise, authentic and brilliant human, Andee Scarantino. It’s called Day One. Every day is day one. The first day. Sometimes I think of the old saying, “it’s the first day of the rest of your life.” I almost passed on the opportunity. Barry was dealing with major shifts at work in Omaha and traveling to NC as often as possible and we were helping our son move to NC. Barry pushed me just enough saying, “maybe this is exactly what you need right now.” Another brownie point for BearKat.

DayOners meet on a zoom call every Saturday for an hour. We are trying to go live in the middle of the week with whoever can make it. Everything is recorded so we can catch what we missed. We are required to post on the Circle app daily. It started out as encouragement but recently moved to a requirement. Why would that be? Cause we are here to grow, stretch, learn and do hard stuff. And it’s easy to just not do it because it’s so - damn - hard.

This is a tight group. It is remarkable. There are 13 of us. On our call last Saturday I said, “we are all so very different”. And another dayoner said, “I was just thinking we were all the same.” And we are both right. This group is all over the place geographically, 2 in NYC, North Carolina, Virginia, Utah, California, Iowa, Belgium, British Columbia, Pittsburg. The Circle app is our own private room. Actors, film makers, writers, coaches, a motivational speaker, a reiki master and office manager. All of us are cheerleaders and therapists for each other. We refer to our meeting space as the pillow fort/fortress. It feels that good for all of us.

Check out a few gems I’ve learned in Day One:

What can I do right now?

What is my identity and is it serving me?

We all tie our own knots.

Sit with it.

If the why isn’t big enough, you don’t care enough.

Be a lighthouse. Take care of yourself.

Show up. Showing up for yourself is most important.

We are all on a hero’s journey. And we are the main character.

Name your dragon. And slay it. (I’m not comfortable sharing my dragon’s name but her initials are emefer)

Be a lighthouse. Show up. What can I do right now? These are the three that are saving my life right now. Since the beginning of time, we’ve been told to take care of ourselves and to show ourselves love and respect. Taking care of ourselves is how we become a lighthouse. And that is how we help others by being an example. Anne Lamott said, “Help is the sunny side of control." Quit helping so much and be a damn lighthouse.

What matters at the end of the day is whether or not I showed up. I intend on showing up once a day. I can do once a day. I’ve gone crazy a couple times and showed up for myself and someone else. Astonishing. Showing up for myself once a day is a deposit in the bank of Vikki. It’s a vote for my importance to myself. It feels good.

When the shit hits the fan, and it will, I’m gonna need something to pull me out of full on worry-wart mode. Because when I’m in worry-wart mode, I am not being present. I’m either anticipating all the bad things that might happen or looking back at what I screwed up. But this tiny little question, “what can I do right now?” will lead me into action I can take toward solving the problem. It’s miraculous. Try it for yourself.

If you are interested in learning more about dragons and heros, check out this movie. “Finding Joe” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s8nFACrLxr0 It’s a story about Joseph Campbell and A Hero’s Journey. Joseph Campbell was a philosopher, an author and one of the leading mythology experts of all time. He discovered that all our stories, movies, fables are the same. It’s a fascinating lesson.

If you are looking for a coach or a podcast or a newsletter or a community of women who are willing to work through all the crap with you - I gotcha.

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